Anxiety causes a host of illnesses and even has a strongly negative impact on such conditions as Parkinson’s disease and dementia.  It can also take a huge toll on our sleep. It’s key to why I became a Solution Focussed Hypnotherapist, so much so that my own personal experience of anxiety is featured on my main website.  I remember very clearly being highly stressed in a corporate finance job in Jakarta.  I was even feeling anxious whilst watching people on the beach.  Despite the idyllic Javanese location all I could think of was the next day’s certain bombardment of demanding messages from various offices around the world.  As I sat watching them in my 4×4 I was struck by how happy and relaxed the fisherman were despite having no car and little money. Have you ever felt that way?

The next day I spoke to Sarge in the office.  He wasn’t stressed at all, despite having a similar role to myself.  I realised his way of thinking was very different to the pathway my own thoughts were taking and this started me on my journey to where I am today.  Learning how to reduce stress and anxiety and find a calmer you can be life-changing. It certainly was for me. Many of the following points helped me recover from my extreme anxiety.  It was later that I trained as a Solution Focussed Hypnotherapist and I still hypnotise myself from time to time. 

Understanding stress vs anxiety

Whilst the words “stress” and “anxiety” are often used interchangeably they are distinct characteristics that affect us differently. Stress emerges from external pressures but anxiety, is a more persistent feeling.  On the beach in a relaxing environment, with no stress present, I was anxious, apprehensive, and even a tad fearful/tearful

Recognising the differences between stress and anxiety helps us manage our emotional health, as is being able to identify what triggers your own stress or anxiety.  Understanding the brain science behind this is a significant step along the pathway to regaining a calmer, happier you.  A great deal of this information is available online.  In my free initial sessions and presentations to groups I explain the particular parts of that science which relate to the issues people are coping with.  More generally there are various steps people can take toward that ultimate goal of recovering their true self, which to me is how I felt when I was six years old, on a beach at Scarborough, just full of laughter.  I’m not always that far along the path but I never feel as I did on that beach in Java.

Awareness of your symptoms

Anxiety can grow gradually through a continual drip of stress from, maybe minor, negative interactions.  As our anxiety grows we move from our intelligent mind to our Primitive Emotional Mind (PEM).  Recognising this process is the first step toward controlling it.  I’ve named my PEM “Terry”, like a terrier he occasionally yaps at me and I just tell him to shut up.

You may notice symptoms such as constant unease, perhaps escalating to a rapid heartbeat or shortness of breath.  You may even experience stomach issues or have difficulty concentrating. 

Helpful daily habits

Adopting some of these positive daily habits can help reduce anxiety:

• Many people I work with keep a diary of what they have done each day and what’s been good. In Java I was focussing on what’s been bad. A focus on what’s been good really helps. I even write down “washing” with a tick next to it when I’ve put it on and a second tick when it’s off the line and put away.
• Spend five minutes each morning with some deep breathing.
• Interact with people in a positive way. This can be asking the check-out person at Aldi how they are and having a chat.
• Positive actions such as exercise and activity. Even a slight increase helps, and once that’s done it tends to develop into more activity. Cycling or walking to the shop can be a good place to start.
• Do or read something new. It could be as simple as cooking up a new dish or lighting a candle in the evening.
• Read less on social media and the news. The Dalai Lama says he avoids reading the news as it focusses on the bad and people are mainly good.

And finally……

Maintain a clear, uncluttered  environment at home.  Perhaps have a clear-out and donate the proceeds to charity. Perhaps buy and look after a house plant.

Consider your nutrition. I was engaged on a project for a firm in India that made coffee machines.  There was one in every meeting room. I realised I was having over 20 shots of espresso each day.  Obviously that’s an extreme example but your diet affects your mood and changing it can help. 

Consider your sleep environment. Follow a bedtime routine and ensure you are not easily disturbed. If you need to have your mobile near you then set it so you are not receiving notifications. As I explain in my sessions, sleep, particularly Rapid Eye Movement sleep, is essential to your health.

People really love supporting people. As well as one’s friends there are a huge number of networks available to meet and speak with others that suffer from anxiety. The Walk and Talk for Men groups are coordinated nationally (www.walkandtalk4men.com) and there are location specific groups for women on Facebook

There are many mindfulness and meditation apps and other ways to gain insights on this such as YouTube, and some of my clients have found this to be very beneficial.